21 February 2017

Yellow Shirts

Abigail wants everything to be in yellow. It's totally her favorite color.


Every morning when we get ready for school, she requests a yellow shirt, yellow socks, sometimes yellow pants. And while I have no problem dressing her in yellow every day until she picks a new favorite color, I really don't want every single girl I have to don a uniform of yellow when she hits my stash 4T clothes.

So I decided to compromise at a few yellow tanks that we could layer under her sweaters. Within a few weeks, we found ourselves at a giant outlet mall with tons of kids' clothing stores. But guess what, guys? Yellow is so not in season for girls this spring.

Yep. The store clerks looked at me like, "Yeesh - why do I work here again?" Scanning the store in hopes that I just disappear by the time they turned around again. "What do you need it for?" They'd ask, like they are hoping to talk me out of it.

Outside of summer, it's incredibly hard to find tanks for toddlers period, let alone longer ones with which you can layer. You know what I mean? For example, if I wanted to add a pop of color to an outfit or make a shirt more modest, I could just head on over to Old Navy - okay, we can all take a moment to laugh at the thought of me quickly popping anywhere with my brood - find their tank top table, and pick up something at least close to what I want. Basic tanks for something like $8 each + 10% off with one of their ever-running coupons. (It's been a while since I've spruced up my wardrobe with anything other than a pair of Lularoe leggings, but that's about what I remember their prices being.)

Anyway, there is this website, Primary.com - I've never used it, but I saw an ad and bookmarked it. So they sell pretty much every basic style of baby and kids clothes in a whole host of solid colors. Their tanks are $10/each or $9 if you buy 3 or more. Now those aren't disgusting prices, but they also definitely aren't stock up prices either. That's a price I'd pay if I really need a certain color for a Halloween costume or a school color or something.

So I'm standing in Carters when suddenly I get an idea. "Well, do you have any plain white tanks?" Matt gives me a funny look. "I'm going to dye them," I say and sprint toward the register with two 2-packs at $6/each before Matt can foresee any reason my craft idea might not work out and give me an "Oooookay," that totally means it's costing me brownie points to press onward.

The next day I head to the craft section of Meijer in search of some Rit dye. The bad news? They are all out of yellow. The good news? They have orange on clearance for $.60! I decide in that moment that I am an alchemist and can turn orange into yellow. When I get home, I pretend I don't hear Matt as he confusedly studies the orange bottle of dye. The less he knows about my alchemy, the better.


The instructions on the bottle are for pounds of fabric and I have no idea how much four toddler tank tops weigh, so in that moment I also become a math genius and calculate what percentage of the bottle of dye I will need based on tank top weight x divided by who-gives-a-shit-just-roll-with-it. And I definitely don't tell Matt any of this because the man measures water for Kraft mac 'n cheese and I just know he'd faint if I told him the truth.

Y'all know what's coming.



Not yellow. So I Google: "Can I use bleach to lighten fabric?"
Okay, Matt, look away now.
Yes, siree! Do I look up a recipe? No I don't!
Tanks + cold water + some random amount of dumped bleach!


Who has time for that shit? Plus, I don't want to get bleach all over my measuring cups!

So after a bleach soak and a bleach wash, I have this:


We're going to go with yellow-y. I'm going to enthusiastically present Abigail with one tomorrow. "Look! Yellowy shirt! Yay, yellowy!" and see if she's buying.


If she's not, Girlfriend will find a yellow Primary tank in her Easter basket this year.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hey, they're evenly colored, after a random dye and random bleach treatment. I think you're a genius! And measuring water for Mac n cheese cracked me up -my husband doesn't measure anything, so when Daddy makes breakfast, the eggs, crepes or pancakes never taste the same as they did last time! TB

Iseoni Austin said...

Those might not be yellow but they are really, really pretty. The bleach affected all the parts differently so they look very spendy.