Today started out with a good last night. The nagging cold was almost gone and I finally had a breakthrough in the patterns I've been writing, which will hopefully form the core of my Etsy shop. After several days, dogged by feelings of inadequacy and the desire to quit, I succeeded. A small success, but enough to give me momentum. A good night, a good morning. Everyone in a good mood, New Year's Resolutions officially re-begun after the sickness hiatus. Finding a lost item I'd been searching for for weeks. A good workout while Abigail quietly read books. An all-day feeling of closeness to God. Good, wholesome playtime with Abigail and cozy snuggles after her new, two-hour, once-a-day nap. And a few moments stollen away to blog while Abigail entertains herself. Dinner on the table when Matt arrives home. A validating day - I'm doing things right. I'm loved. I'm successful.
No one can tell when these days will come or how bad the preceding or following days will be. You can only suck as much marrow from them as possible in 24 hours before the doldrums of winter return with gray skies and eye-lash freezing temperatures.
Tomorrow we'll take down the Christmas decorations, but for one last night tonight, we'll turn off all the lights in the apartment and sit beneath the glow of the Christmas tree, counting our blessings and sucking marrow to reinforce us for the days in between the next everything-goes-right day.